I haven't been apart from you on Mother's Day since 2008. This year we are thousands of kilometres apart (16,516km to be precise), and I wish I could be back in Brisbane to tell you this in person. But instead we will Skype, and hug the screens in front of us and try to bridge the oceans between us. So I thought I would put down some words to tell you how much I love, adore, appreciate and god damn miss you!
Firstly, Happy Mother's Day. I hope you have opened the card I left behind. In addition to those words I just wanted to say:
a) I love your laugh. I realise that I can hear it over Skype, but it is such a wonderful whole body laugh that isn't the same over the internet. Make sure there is lots of laughter on Mother's Day.
b) I hope you know that you are such a wonderful, inspirational person. Through all the shitty and tough times, you constantly look ahead. Not that you are unnervingly positive, just that you are so resilient and tough. I look at you and you give me the balls (or maybe the boobs?) to keep going in the tough times.
c) I love your sense of adventure, and it is something that I am trying to adopt over here. That sense that everything is interesting, and every person's story is worth asking and listening to.
d) I miss your Jo Malone perfume. I walked through Harrod's the other day and caught a fleeting trail of the perfume and wished that I could have hugged you. (I don't know if this is creepy or not).
e) I miss family lunches, and the whole experience that you create. From everyone getting in and cooking together, to Dad commentating from his study. I wish I could be there with everyone on your special day, but I hope you know that I am there in thought.
I hope you don't mind, but I have collected some pictures I love of you below. They make me smile so much.
Love you and HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!
xx
N
In the dark moments when you wonder why you keep trying to be a good person, a drop falls on you and you are blessed. Thank you for writing, not just these beautiful words, but writing in itself,for it is an art drifting off into the horizon.
ReplyDeleteI miss you too, so much, but my heart is divided between wanting you here and wanting you to have what you deserve.
It's not creepy at all to smell the perfume of those you love. Kate will tell you as well, that we have two bottles that you left and we inhale your presence continually.
Tears run down my face. Tears of happiness and love.
Take care my darling daughter, my first born; the day I saw the world in a completely different way.
All my love forever.
Mum xox
PS thanks for the great photos, they shine of happiness.